Be Yourself

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“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” – Oscar Wilde

It is very important to always be yourself.

It is equally as important to believe in yourself.

The Problem

I’m consistently see girls who lack self-confidence. I am here to let you know you are beautiful and awesome the way you are. I can’t stress this enough!

You should always embrace who you are by being strong and showing the world what you have to offer. Don’t be afraid to stand out in the crowd and do what’s right or what makes you happy. Don’t participant in activities that feel wrong or make you unhappy. Don’t act like someone you are not and don’t let a friend sway you to do something that’s not you.

If you struggle with confidence, then now is the time to take control and take action in discovering who you are. You may be thinking, “Jae, that is easier said than done”. Well, I am here to tell you by taking a few beginner steps toward believing in yourself, you can conquer your lack of self.

Let’s Begin by Being Yourself

I challenge you to write at least five character traits that make you who you are. It can be a personality trait, a physical feature, your taste in fashion, a sport or activity, a goal, etc. After you write out your list, step back and read it again. Begin to embrace who you are and own it. Be proud of your uniqueness and be positive about what you like.

I would really love for you to share your uniqueness with me. Posting your best qualities can help spark others to think about their own. You can tweet me @ JAE_Blog, email them to me jae@jaetaft.com, or leave them as a comment below. I will be posting mine to twitter and this blog.

Really take the time to think about what makes you and embrace it.

If you take anything from this just challenge I would hope that you understand “You” are who defines who you are, not anyone else.

Just be “You”!

Much Lovemuch love,
Jae

Thing that make up me:
1. My love for basketball and working out
2. I’m outgoing and Positive
3. I love setting goals and having dreams
4. My love for fashion
5. my appetite is rather large

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High School Pressures

High school can be a fun and exciting experience. High school can also be a bad and stressful experience, too. During your four years of high school you may fail a test in math, be bullied by mean kids, get into an argument with your friend, or fail to make a team. How you let it effect you is your choice. You have the choice to let it affect you in a negative or positive way. I’m not saying it easy to ignore a bully or study for a big test, however if you take little steps to improve your all-around happiness you won’t regret it.

During your high school years you can face a lot of pressure situations. In reality, there are very few important “pressures” that actually come along with being a high school student. Just so we make this clear, the important pressures are ones like earning good grades, completing your school work, and maintaining good character. These are just normal stuff that comes along with high school.

The negative high school pressures that I’m talking about are dating, drinking, and drugs. Take it from me, I am going to be a junior this year and I have never dated. Guess what? I’m fine. My personal opinion is dating right now is not best for me because I have goals in my life I want to accomplish. Dating would conflict with my goals. I am not saying you should never date in high school. I’m just saying be careful. Most people have goals that they want to accomplish whether it is for that particular year or for life after graduation. If you are not one hundred percent committed and focus to your goals, then dating can influence you and prevent you from reaching them. I have always told myself if I date in high school, then my boyfriend would have to understand my commitment to basketball and my other priorities. The reason I set this standard for myself is because my goals in life are very important to me and I don’t want anything to stop me from reaching those goals. Don’t be afraid to have this conversation before you become in a committed relationship. And hey, it’s high school! There is a very small chance you will marry this person anyway. My advice to you is never feel pressured that you have to date in high school.

The second and most important point I want to strongly stress to you is to not be one of those teens who fall under peer pressure by trying drugs and becoming drunk at parties. I cannot say this enough. There is nothing good about drugs and underage drinking. Unfortunately, we will continually to see underage drinking until people wake up. Many kids who have so much going for them will have it all taken away in the matter of minutes. Using drugs and alcohol have only negative consequences. You will get caught, possible loose a scholarship, be expelled from school, or unfortunately sometimes death occurs.

Please do me favor and more importantly, do you a favor. Don’t try drugs and alcohol even once. If you feel that you won’t be popular or one of the “cool kids” by not trying drugs, then you need to change your way of thinking. If you feel alone and you think that your emptiness inside would be cured by trying drugs, don’t listen to yourself. In fact, talk to me or reach out to a friend. There is always someone willing to listen and help.

High school can be such a fun experience. Don’t let silly things ruin the only fours years you have. Life is too awesome to become caught up in stuff that will bring you down. Remember, to always be yourself, stick to your morals and good things will come your way. I promise.

Much Lovemuch love,

Jae


photo credit: Lotus Carroll via photopin cc

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Being a Leader

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Different sports are played in different seasons, while some seem to always be in season. Whether your sport is in-seasons or  pre-season,  I hope your training is going well.

I wanted to take a minute and write about what it means to be the “point guard” or the “quarterback” of your team. Keep in mind, I am not just talking about the sport of basketball or football. I talking about what defines a leader of a team. Most often if you are placed in one of these two positions, you possess leadership qualities. This is not always the case. If you don’t currently have the characteristics of a leader, there is no reason why you cannot learn.

Characteristics of a Point Guard

Here are a few characteristics that are very important to possess:

  • Carry the Team on Your Back– By this I don’t mean you have the best stats on the team. What I do mean is the players on your team know that you have there back . You lead them to success. You take the blame for some things that you know it’s not your fault and you do things that help benefit the team.
  • Be an Encourager– Be your teammates biggest fan. Always clap and talk during practices and games. Be very enthusiastic and upbeat.
  • Always Make Eye Contact– Always know what’s going on. Regularly look your teammates in the eyes and show them you care. Be a great listener. Always have eye contact with coaches while they are teaching you and have a nice solid stance. Stand with feet shoulder width apart with your arms in front or behind your body. Do not lean on one leg looking around or day dreaming about what is going on after practice.  I can’t emphasize this enough….always make eye contact!
  • Be a Respectable Person – Be a great competitor on the playing field. Be nice and respectful to people. Post game, be sure to clean up after yourself or team. If you see a piece of trash, then pick it up and throw it out.  Have integrity and don’t just be a good person when your coach is watching. Be good person all the time. Simple remember…no trash on or off the floor!
  • Be Vocal – Direct your teammates and encourage them. You don’t just yell at them in a hateful manner because they made a mistake. Walk up to them and explain what they should have done, followed up by giving them a few compliments on what she have been doing well.  Don’t forget to continue with the  encouraging words.

These are just a few tips to help you be the “point guard” of your team. It might not be easy to do these things all the time, but trust me if you keep working and constantly practice using these characteristics  they will become second nature . Your teammate will have nothing but great respect for. You can be a leader even if you are not involved in a sport. All of the topics I wrote about can be applied to your club or activity that you are involved in.

Much Lovemuch love,

Jae

photo credit: lumaxart

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Girls Don’t Let Girls Run Slow

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I want to share with you a new movement I am starting, “Girls Don’t Let Girls Run Slow”.

It has absolutely zero to do with athletic ability. It simply means, as girls, we need to have each others backs.

There are many girls who are struggling somewhere in their life. We need to do all we can to uplift each other by stepping in and lending a hand.

Stop the Drama

One of the biggest problems that cause negative feelings towards each other is drama. Just being in the high school atmosphere you see a lot of it. I have personally witness negative drama ruin friendships, cause tension between individuals who don’t know much about each other, and turn people against one another. Doesn’t drama seem awful? To be honest with you I really don’t like it. The reason being is 99% of the drama that goes on won’t matter within a short period of time. I know this might be hard because you can easily become caught up in the moment, but lets think about how big the issue is compared to the effects it might have later down the road.

Help a Struggling Peer

It is very import ant to be there for one another. When you see a girl struggling, even if it is just a simple math problem, let her know you are there to help even if you are having trouble figuring it out yourself. If you see girl being bullied, then stand up for her and be there for support. Make peers aware they can talk to you about anything and you will be there to listen.

Follow the Right Crowd

One very important message I want to stress and address is if you see a female peer going off on the wrong path by following the wrong coward and experimenting with drugs, alcohol, or any unhealthy choice, then be there to guide her back onto the right path.

Just think about it….if you were struggling, being bullied or starting to follow the wrong path would you want someone to be there for you?

Let’s forget about the clicks and the popularity. I believe we need to pick others up around us. Help one another and be there for each other. Make each other feel good about themselves. I’m not saying you have to be the best of friends. But that doesn’t mean you can’t be friendly to one other.

Girls, don’t let girls run slow!

Much Lovemuch love,
Jae

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Strength vs. Strength

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We all know that strength is a big part of sports. The real key to sports is being strong enough to handle the physical contact, being able to throw harder and faster than your competitor, and having the capability to hit harder then your opponent.

You may have great strength in your sport, but do you have strength in your life?

Let me ask you another question. Are you strong enough to say “No” to something you don’t want to do? For instance, you are at your best friend’s house and her parents are not home. She asks you if you want a drink of her parent’s alcohol. Will you say “No?” Or will you say “Yes” because she is your best friend.

Strength plays a huge part in sports, but it plays an even bigger part in life. Will you have the strength to stand up and control your life? Will you have the strength to say “No” to drugs and alcohol? And, will you have the strength to stand up for someone who is being bullied?

Be strong! Have the strength to stand up and go against the pressures you might face. Believe in yourself and believe that by standing against what is wrong you will be better off. People will look back and respect and admire you for having the strength to say “No” to the things you knew where wrong.

I have faith that every single one of you can build this strength!

Much Lovemuch love,
Jae

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